Hi all! Just in case you wanted to read about my coming of success, here it is. Enjoy!
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I looked down at my tweed overalls. The milky coffee colored fabric was interrupted by globs of colorless and flavorless chickpea gruel. I looked up through my chickpea splattered glasses at the cafeteria I saw everyone staring, everyone laughing at me and at the horrible predicament I was caught in.
I ran. I didn't know how fast I was running, but it was fast enough that I couldn't see the kids mocking me anymore. But then again, that could have been my tear coated eyes blurring them out. I ran to the one spot I always ran to: my science teacher Mr. Matzoball's room closet. I closed the pine scented doors behind me and crouched down beneath the beakers of unknown chemicals. I sat there and rocked. I rocked and thought. I rocked as I thought about my imaginary world: Johnny World. I thought about Archie, my chickpea assaulter. I thought about how I would get all the citizens of Johnny World to throw all the chickpea gruel in all of Veggie Ville at him. Revenge was as sweet as the deadly jellybeans.
Then, as quickly as you can burn chocolate, the door to the closet swung open and standing there was a startled Mr. Matzoball. He eyed me suspiciously, but I knew he trusted me enough to know I wasn't stealing the unknown chemicals. I looked up at him with my eyes round and earnest. "Will you help me throw 1,000 pounds of chickpea gush at Archie Artichoke?
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I was thankful when, two hours later the bell rang and I was free to go back to my hole. Mr. Matzoball had allowed me to stay hyperventilating in his closet for the rest of the day as long as I still did the work. You can imagine how odd it was for the rest of the class to see their teacher going inside a closet and muttering to who they thought was nobody, and coming out with completed work. I didn't think they were on to me though.
As I walked through the calm streets of Veggie Ville, I hummed to myself with my hands in my chickpea soaked overalls. I shook my head in disgust. How had I allowed myself to be such a dork and wear such ugly pants? Perhaps it was almost a good thing Archie had brutally flung the bean goo at me. These pants really couldn't get any worse.
I continued to walk along the streets when I heard laughter: loud laughter, and loud music too. There was a party, a raucous if you will. It was at Archie's gorgeous vine house. I stared for awhile, imagining how much of a party animal I would be if I were just invited to one. Then he saw me, Archie that is. He looked up and narrowed his eye leaves at me. Then I ran. (I run a lot)
I sped down the street and dashed down the muddy fields. I could hear whistling winds in my ear as I bolted even faster than they could. Faster, faster, faster I ran. The loud music faded away, replaced be eerie silence. Faster, faster, faster, CRASH! I fell to the ground. What had I hit? It was a lamppost. A lamp post? How had I missed a lamp post? It was almost as if it hadn't been there, and it suddenly appeared, as if it was destiny for me to bruise my puny skull on it.
It was then that I noticed a sign on the post. Had Mrs. Lettuce lost her pet lima bean again? No, this sign wasn't for a lost lima bean, it read:
Beware citizens of Veggie Ville:
A horrible monster of the sugar variety has escaped and gotten loose.
It may appear in your town at any time or place, so be prepared.
If you spot it, do not fight it at all, instead PLEASE call 1-800-8-LOST SWEET
Reward $10,000 and a featured article in the Veggie Digest.
I knew what I had to do, I had to find this monster. Not just for my sake, but for all the carrots who had chickpea gruel thrown at them and desperately needed popularity.
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I was so happy it was the weekend. I sat in my hole and thought. This monster, how had it been created? Why was it created? How did it get loose? Where was it? WHAT was it? These and many more thoughts floated in my head. No matter what I did, they were always there. Then more would come to my mind. Why hadn't the cops found it yet? Did they want to find it? Was it so dangerous even the police and army couldn't handle it? Well if the police couldn't handle it, there was no way I could. I was a scrawny little carrot for crying out loud! The police are trained warriors practically! I wasn't a warrior, let alone even better than one! How could I find this monster?
Then again, I would be rich. I could buy clothes all the other veggies wear. I could be famous! Everyone would know Johnny George: The Super Carrot. The teachers wouldn't give me homework, how could they if I was spending all my time fighting bad guys? Surely the school had some policy that teachers could inflict homework on a super hero?
No, it was too dangerous. It really was. Furthermore, I didn't even know where to look! In the woods? In the town? In the garages? In the fields? There were just too many places to count. Also, I was just a student in my senior year of High School. My priority was school before all else, including being a Super Carrot.
But oh how I wanted to be a Super Carrot! I knew I needed this fame thing bad. I needed to be more than, "That nerdy orange thing that's 17". Everyone needed to know me. I needed to sign autographs. Maybe like: or something. Or possibly: . Ya, I think I liked that. Wherever I went, people would cheer for me. "Super Carrot, Super Carrot, Super Carrot..." I heard them call. I opened my eyes. Someone was calling my name, and knocking on my door. I opened it and saw chickpea gruel had been thrown all over it. I saw Archie and the rest of the football team running away. How dare they throw chickpea gruel at the home of Super Carrot!
I stared at this crazy vegetable talking to me through a webcam. He was telling me all sorts of nonsense. I thought about how I had met him. I vividly remembered picking up my phone and calling the number on the sign. The operator was ecstatic, thinking I had found the monster. Her voice dropped when I said I wanted to help find the monster. I told her I was strong, brave, and even gave her some references to the numbers of my fellow chess club mates. (I am actually rather convincing). She sighed but explained the team needed as much help on the mission as they could get. She had me set up a webcam meeting with my future mentor.
And that was where I was now, sitting in a chair, talking to a mushroom about strategies on monster hunting, and, of course, monster finding. He seemed nice enough, and he gave me lots of information that answered most of my questions. The monster was a milkshake, a frappe. It was created by the Sugar Scientist and was going to be used to assist him with his newest evil scheme, but the monster turned out to be his newest evil scheme, and ran away to be unleashed to the awaiting public. The reason the police hadn't found it yet was mostly because they were scared of it. After all, it was made of sugar.
Major Mushroom (the webcam mentor I was chatting with) told me how to visit his teams' secret headquarters in one week. Until then he asked me to go to the gym as much as possible. My first test would be soon after that. Trust me, I could wait.
First thing on my list was to do the most dangerous and un-imaginable thing I could think of: Flirt with the lady of the front desk of the gym into giving me a free membership.
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I woke with a jolt. Today was the day I would go meet Major Mushroom in his secret headquarters. I sank back into my covers as I remembered that I had failed into getting a membership to the gym: A new, slightly un-cooperative gentleman was experiencing his first shift that day. At least I had walked away with a smidgen of dignity left in me.
Suddenly I found myself at my door, and walking outside. Darn my stupid, perfect conscience! I barely had enough time to throw on my jacket before I started running down the street. I stopped at the lamp post where I had originally seen the sign. I leaned closer to it, and whispered the sacred password: "mushroomlicious".
The paper flier suddenly blew away and a small hole was left where it had been. I crawled into the pea sized (literally, pea sized) opening into the hollow post where I slid down a long slide and landed plop in a chair. I was in a large, for the most part empty room that was sort of shaped like an octagon. A spotlight shone on two vegetables coming towards me, a wasabi bean and a mushroom. The mushroom spoke.
"Hello Jonathan and welcome to your new headquarters. You will live, breathe and sleep everything here. That is mostly because you will be living here. You will wake up at 6:22 AM on the dot and will have a strict bedtime of 8:00 unless you are still out on your mission, in which case you will sleep when you arrive. But there will be no excuses for not waking up at 6:22. You will notice the large television projector." At this I realized that that giant wall was in fact a screen. "If I am not here, you will see me talking to you and explaining your instructions. Be aware that I can see you too, so no funny business." At this I nodded my head meekly. There were so many rules!
"This here is Willy Wasabi. Willy, greet our newest member of the squad," Major Mushroom continued as he motioned to the bean as he waved lightly at me. I nodded in return. "Willy is an intern here, he's learning how to be a major like me. Do not be alarmed if he gives you instructions over me. He is a wise pupil." he smiled admiringly at Willy, but Willy gave no response. "Well that's about it!" Major Mushroom sang brightly. "Willy, please give Jonathan a tour. See you both at dinner!" And the mushroom walked away.
"Be careful," Willy snickered creepily towards me. "We're underground. No one will hear you when you scream." I gulped, and he proceeded to show me around.
Dinner was fine, to put it lightly. However, I don't think that I made a very good first impression of the team when I would automatically scream every five minutes just to see if I heard any commotion above me in the streets: I didn't. There was some friendly and light chat, mostly about the teams training that day. They were covered in mud and there bristles stuck out in random places, but they still smiled. The food was ok, but nothing special. But it all tasted like sawdust when Major Mushroom told me I was to begin my training the next day. I too would crawl in mud, wrestle through electric fences and jump from tire to tire til sundown. I froze and stayed frozen, with my spoon almost to my mouth. I almost ate chickpea gruel.
I excused myself from the table at exactly 7:22 to give me some time to just reconnect with my inner being before it was smothered in mud. I meditated and hummed to myself something like: "Omm...I will be a great warrior....Omm...I will be strong and fearless...omm...what is that strong smell? Omm...it smells rather like a sewer...Omm...I don't think I like it all that much...Omm...the least they could do is give me some air freshener...Omm--" I opened one of my eyes to Willy standing in my room acting like I was some kind of weirdo for connecting with my inner being. I eyed him through my one open eye. "May I help you?"
"No," he responded flatly. "I just came to warn you that Major Mushroom is doing a bed check so I would stop acting like a budah and get in your bed." How rude!
"Thank you, but do you happen to know what smells so profoundly?"
"No, no I don't" Willy professed. "Now get to bed," he walked away proud and straight, but I could see that he was holding something to where I wasn't able to see. But I caught a glimpse anyways. Air freshener. That jerk face.
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The next morning I woke up at 5:47 on the dot. I jumped out of bed, threw on a robe and ran down into the main octagonal shaped room.
"I'M HERE! I'M HERE! I WOKE UP ON TIME! DON'T KILL ME!"
To my horror I saw that everyone else was still sleeping. Only then did I look at my watch. "Shoot," I muttered to myself. I looked up from my watch glumly as I made my way back to my room. "YAAHHH!!!" I shrieked as I looked up. A giant head of a mushroom stared back at me plainly, with barely any expression.
"Good morning Jonathan," Major Mushroom crooned.
"Oh, uh, good morning, uh, sir. Sorry for uh, you know, screaming." I turned my head down so I wouldn't see his disapproving face.
"Quite ok Jonathan, quite ok. How was your sleep?"
"Oh, fine sir. Just great actually. Except...well...nevermind."
"No, please, do tell."
"Well, there was quite an awful odor in my room last night. Vaguely smelled like a sewer. Do you know what it was?"--
"Are you saying that my quarters are not suitable? After all that work I did to make it the most comfortable in the entire headquarters you say it is not suitable for you? How dare you!"
"I'm sorry sir," I stammered, quite taken aback.
"No, no, quite alright. You didn't know. Now go back to bed." Major Mushroom seemed a bit embarrassed, but I could understand why. It was weird that both Willy and Major Mushroom seemed offended when I brought up the odor. Ah well, I said to myself. About 23 more minutes of blissful sleep.
The horn blasted in my ear. My first approach was to scream "FIRE! FIRE! EVERYONE OUT OF THE BUILDING!" But then I understood that it was the horn to wake us up. I, again, ran downstairs, this time to my utter shock to find that the whole rest of the team had gotten dressed in their uniforms, was sitting at the table and had already began to much on their Fruity Pebbles in the time it had taken me to sprint downstairs. I awkwardly made my way to the table with my head hanging.
"You are exactly 43 seconds late, Jonathan."
The rest of the team snickered at this as I mumbled, "Sorry, sir," with my head still hanging. I sat down at the table in a spot as far away from Major Mushroom and Willy as possible. As soon as I sat down, the whole room gasped and began to whisper to themselves. Quite oblivious, I looked up from my seat in bewilderment at the group. An eggplant next to me leaned over and whispered, "That's the sacred seat. It once belonged to the greatest agent we have ever had. He left us one day, some say he died on a mission, others say he went mad. No one ever dares to sit in his seat."
"Agent Eggplant, is there a problem?" Major Mushroom called out clearly, and surprisingly calmly. "There will be no talking behind my back at breakfast. And I give Jonathan permission to sit there, Agent S isn't going to ever come back, and I think it is time for a change. Jonathan, enjoy your breakfast."
I hated that lady at the front desk of the gym. Did she not understand how desperately I needed to work out before joining the team? Then again I don't think I fully understood how important it was for me to join the gym. But I understood now. We were climbing ropes. And crawling through mud. Oh, and doing tons and tons of jumping jacks. I was sweating like a, a, a human! I mean the sweat just wouldn't stop coming! And the heat, the heat was awful! I could feel it just beneath my skin, begging to escape into the fresh air. Then it would escape, it would sort of drift off of my body, only to make room for more heat.
"Come on, come on! Faster team, faster! Do you feel the burn?"
"No sir!" the team cried out to the coach as if in pain.
"Are you weak?" the coach bellowed again.
"No sir!"
"Will you give up?"
"No sir!"
"Are you hot?" the coach suddenly creeped up from behind me and whispered into my ear.
"N-n-n-no sir. N-no. No not at all."
"Really? 'cause you seem pretty sweaty" He cooed to me in a creepy voice. "Pretty tired...pretty weak..." coach continued.
"No sir. No, no I'm not."
"GOOD!" He boomed in my ear, causing me to fall down. "'cause if you were, you'd have to get what Agent S got...and that wouldn't be good."
"But I thought he just disappeared?" I mumbled so he almost couldn't hear me.
"Sure..." the coach said, back to his eerie voice. "Sure, let's go with that..."
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I rubbed my aching body with my callused hands. I muttered to myself gibberish about how much I hated Coach Coconut. He was nuts, and a jerk. I continued muttering when the eggplant from breakfast walked in.
"Hey," he sympathized slowly. "How'd your first day of training go?
"Awful...hey...where were you? I didn't see you there..." I replied, slowly and thoughtfully.
"Oh, um, well ya. See, if you like, pass that level of training, then you do something else. Like um...watch a movie..." He muttered the "watch a movie" part quietly with his head down, he eyed me when he finished.
"You WHAT? You get to watch a movie? While I do jumping jacks? How dare you!"
"Sorry dude! It isn't my choice! I had to do jumping jacks too when I was at your level!" He retorted as he raised his hands in the air.
"Fine," I mumbled, because, though I didn't want to admit it, I believed him.
I was about to ask him stuff about Agent S, but Willy walked in right then."Agent Eggplant! What are you doing in Jonathan's room? Do you not remember the rules?" he asked arrogantly.
"Yes sir, yes I do."
"Then you should probably leave before I tell Major Mushroom."
"Yes sir." he whispered. "Bye Jonathan, see you at dinner," he said as he turned to me, then walked out of my room.
"You are going to get it if you don't stop breaking the rules," Willy continued. You could tell that he got pleasure out of humiliating me, and out of calling me Jonathan, not Agent Carrot or whatever.
"Yes sir. See you at dinner."
"Are you trying to get rid of me?" He retorted, his voice rising.
"No sir, not unless you wish to stay as I shower..." I responded smugly.
"Very well. Goodbye," Willy replied, full of himself. I could tell he felt a bit threatened by how I was so earnest and not submissive. Whatever, he'd have to deal. Because tomorrow, when we start our search for the monster, I wouldn't take anything from anyone.
Remember when I said that I wouldn't take anything from anyone? Well, that didn't really work out for me...I took somethings from some people....more like every person I saw. One of the team members asked me to paint my face like a clown...that was not one of my prouder moments in life. Being with this team for one week was almost more than I could bear.
To make everything worse, we hadn't found the monster, in fact we weren't really even on his trail. Coach, Willy and Major Mushroom liked to say that "We're getting close" and "I can feel it in my pulp" and "It's the thought that counts". Trust me, we were all thinking about how lame this whole adventure was. The weather didn't encourage us anymore. I mean, it was sticky, hot, humid and wetter than the Atlantic Ocean. We chopped our way through thick, vegetated jungles. We chopped down lush, heavy plants and wiped our faces after squished bugs spattered themselves on them. They were our food: the bugs I mean. We had remembered to bring food, but let's just say that a big body like Coach needs a big amount of food; or else.
Finally, at about 7:12 we got to a clearing, but it wasn't exactly a natural clearing. You could tell someone had been there. But you couldn't tell if someone was coming back. We were to tired to care. The whole team picked straws and who should pick the short straw but me. Lucky for me, so did Agent Eggplant. Unlucky for me, Willy decided that we needed supervision for the difficult job of sitting on a moldy log, looking for someone that didn't exist. So anyways, Willy kept coming over and asking, "How goes the work?"
Agent Eggplant and I would reply calmly, "Fine. How goes the wife?" We laughed every time we responded like this because we all know that Willy has no wife; except for Willy, who thinks that this lima bean obsessed tomato he met at the grocery is his wife.
I hated to admit it, but it was comfortable and soothing to sit on a log in the woods by the fire, all alone with Agent Eggplant. I really looked up to him, and he was really cool. I complained to him how annoying my school was, and how Archie had thrown chickpea gruel at me. Agent Eggplant was horrified; no one on the team had ever done anything so mean to anyone else. I didn't know if it was the fact that I was tired, the lack of food I had, the fact that I was so far from my house, or any place I knew, but something made me tear up. Right as Agent Eggplant left.
I hated this team. They were no nicer to me than Archie, and they all treated me like I was some kind of dumb vegetable, not a smart one like I really was. I hated that I could ace all of my subjects at school, even gym, and not ace this team. Gym should really teach you stuff more like this. I hated this clearing, I hated that I had to stay awake as everyone else could sleep soundly in a tent. And I hated that when I was tired, the only tent that I had was a piece of tarp layed over a scrawny branch. I hated my life, and I knew that it had better get better: or I would run away.
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Dang it, I hated my eyes right now. They ached, burned and throbbed from last night. I mean, after all, I had kept them open for like, 10 hours or something, every night for almost three weeks now. I had nervously begun to pack my bags last night, and I hid it beneath my sleeping bag. I was going to run away. Today. Before it was 6:22. Right now it was about 5:13, so I still had plenty of time. I hated going behind Major Mushroom and Willy's backs, but I just couldn't stay here anymore. I would never be a Super Carrot.
This team was all about teamwork, all about being one group fighting injustice, why had I ever assumed that I would rise up above these jocks? If Archie ever saw how strong this team was, he'd go crying back home to his mother. I lay back down on the soft, moss coated log. It stank of wet dog and worms. I shut my burning eyes and thought. What had I done with my life? I had been with this team for three weeks, and there was no possible way that I could graduate high school after missing so much work. So I wouldn't graduate, I wouldn't be famous, my team wouldn't appreciate me, what was I still doing here? Since I couldn't answer that question, I knew that I had to run away, today.
It was then that I heard a rustle. A big rustle actually, so big that it sounded as if an entire army of killer ants was coming towards me. I opened my eyes to see what the giant rustle was. I don't think that I have ever screamed that loud in my entire life.
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"MONSTER! MONSTER! EVERYBODY UP, NOW, NOW NOW! WAKE UP, WAKE UP! HELP! HELP!" I screeched so loud I thought that my eardrums would pop. They didn't. As the whole team scrambled frantically out of their tents, I stood there and just examined the monster since he stood frozen staring at me.
He was a glass. A giant glass filled with milkshake. He had scars and stitches all over. He was creepy as heck. I stopped and looked around me. The whole team was lined up perfectly, all with guns. Major Mushroom hid behind the team and was shouting commands. I knew he would tell them not to fire, but rather to capture the monster, so I felt confident that the monster wouldn't get aggressive. I stepped back into the line of everyone else and picked up my gun. I hunched over like all of the other team was doing. We all leaned over onto one knee and waited for a command.
"FIRE!" I heard someone say. WHAT? I thought to myself. Why are we shooting? Why aren't we capturing the monster? What is going on? Obviously, the rest of the team wasn't thinking this, because they were all ferociously shooting at the poor monster. He glass began to crack and chip. He was moaning. I felt fainter than he probably did.
"Stop! Stop! Everybody stop! This monster isn't hurting us! We should capture it and take it home in a net so we can study it! Stop! Stop!" I screamed, my voice straining. The rest of the team did not stop, but kept shooting the monster. His screams got as loud as mine. Then, all of a sudden I heard nothing. I saw nothing. Someone had hit me in the head and I was lying on the ground, about to be unconscious.
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I woke up to find myself back in the headquarters main room. The whole team was around me, all staring at me, eagerly.
"What, what's going on? Where's the monster? Is he ok? What happened?" I asked in pain. Major Mushroom stepped forward.
"You got hit in the head with a gun. Someone hit you, but we are not sure who yet. After you got hit, we all stopped shooting and captured the monster, he is fine. Then we took you back here." Major Mushroom explained slowly.
"But, you mean that whoever hit me is still here?" I questioned, my voice rising in worry.
"Well, yes, technically yes. But just lie down and get some sleep. We are all here." Major Mushroom said as he left. Then it hit me. Someone was not here, not next to me. And that someone hit me with a gun on purpose.
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I had to sleep. I just did. I felt pretty guilty that I didn't run to find the vegetable that hit me, but I had no energy left, no oxygen in my brain. I slept for three whole, blissful hours. I slept hard, like a rock. But I woke up with a jolt after the three hours had passed. I had to find him. I had to. I got up and out of my bed, to my alarm finding out that I was wearing a paper robe, you know, like the kind they give you at the doctors. I didn't care. I got up and ran, (it had been a long time since I had run.) I climbed the stairs from the hospital ward in the headquarters, and went up to the main octagonal shaped room.
"SURPRISE!" Everyone screamed at an unholy level of volume.
"Oh...oh wow...wow guys...thanks..." I mumbled dizzily. I mean, you couldn't blame me--I had just been hit with a gun. I managed to open my eyes enough to make out what was happening around me. The whole team was standing around me, with Major Mushroom, and the room had been decorated with balloons and streamers and banners. I thought that the banners would say "Congrats on getting well" or something, but I saw that they actually said "Happy Birthday Jonathan!!!" I had completely forgotten that today was my birthday. I guess being in a day long comma could make you forget that kind of stuff.
"Gee, guys, thanks. Thanks a lot." I mumbled, I really did try to be loud, but I just couldn't get my voice to project. Someone, I believe Timmy Turnip, came up to me and gently guided me to the chair of honor, Willy's chair. In front of me was a giant pink, (yes pink, come on, guys can have pink food) birthday cake. It had exactly 18 candles, black candles. I used all of the strength I had in me to blow out all of those candles.
Overall, it was a cheery party. Everyone was so happy that I had gotten well and alarmed the rest of the team about the monster. I gotta be honest, I loved the attention. Then, to celebrate my capturing of the monster, the whole team took me down to see the monster. An overwhelming stench of sewage floated up from the body of the monster. I had smelled that exact scent before. Something was still wrong. Someone was still missing.
It was five hours later. I was lying in my bed, I couldn't sleep. The vision of the vegetable that had hit me was in all of my dreams, rather my nightmares. I had to get up and find him.
I quietly crept up the stairs (I was still in the hospital ward) and looked at the big attendance sheet. It would be missing a name card of someone if anyone had stepped out...the vegetable had. I knew that he wasn't here, but I knew it was too late. This vegetable knew he would be found, and he had run away--for good.
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I sat in my room thinking. As I thought, I knit. I knitted a costume fit for a Super Hero, with a cape and all. But I mostly thought. It wasn't safe here for me anymore. I didn't belong here anymore. I knew that the monster was found, and he would be released freely, or possible have his brain altered so that he wouldn't be murderous anymore. I knew that the team was safe from all evil, and that they would be fine without me. But I knew that the vegetable would come for me, or have set up traps for me to get caught in. I had to leave.
I spent an hour packing my things, it was hard to think that I wouldn't live here, that I wouldn't eat here, that I wouldn't see anyone from here again. But I knew that my time here had been cut, and I was partially thankful that it had. After I had finished packing my bags I began to leave the room with my suitcase. It was only then that I remembered that my costume was lying on my bed. My bags were way too full, and there was no way in heck that I could stuff another thing in there, so I would have to throw out the costume. NO! I couldn't do that! I just couldn't. I symbolically put the synthetic costume on, and I felt an odd burst of self confidence when I did. I was strong enough to leave.
After I had blubbered goodbye to everyone, I made my way to the holy elevator. Nobody ever dared go in the elevator, after all, nobody dared go back up to the real world. The elevator was old and musty smelling: I didn't think it had been fixed since 1802. One cool thing about it was that the ceiling of the elevator was sort of made up of rafters, so you could look up them at the elevator shaft, and at the growing light of the real world coming very close to you. Then, all of a sudden, it was right there. You were immersed in bright light, but then you realized it was just the streetlight you were inside (the streetlight was the elevator shaft) and it was actually pitch dark, as it was now night. But after you stepped out of the streetlight, it suddenly shot back down into the ground where a plate of cement covered the hole like it had never even been there.
I made my way down the cobblestone streets, with the bright moonlight and streetlights lightly hitting me. I felt quite alone, quite out of place for the first time in about a month. I whistled to myself that old song nobody knew but always had heard of (My Bonnie, of course!) There was an eerie silence up here in the real world, down in the headquarters you always had the comforting trickling sound of the sewer pipes. All I could here was the clip clopping of my shoes against the stones, and the light whirring of the streetlights.
Wait, what was that sound? That rustle? That scurry of feet? Who else could possibly be up at this hour? Not the constable, he always slept right inside the doughnut shop at night...perhaps it was--no. Or maybe--no. Who could be up and around at this hour? I gulped hard and had a hard time swallowing. I backed up, eying everything around me. "OUCH!" I shrieked as I backed up into a pricker bush. I heard a large yelp and whirled around just in time to see the vegetable staring back at me. On his face was sheer fright and worry, but what scared me the most was the huge amount of fury written in his eyes, enough of it to kill.
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His deep purple skin shone brightly in the light. "Agent Eggplant" I whispered beneath my breath.
"Yes, yes, it is me. I hit you on the head. Kill me, Jonathan, kill me..." he seethed manically, his voice trailing off.
"But why? I thought you were my friend! How could you?"
"Jonathan, like you, I have a double life. You dress up and pretend to be some Super Hero, and I am a Super Villain. I work for the Sugar Scientist."
I gasped. How could Agent Eggplant work for the sugar scientist? I thought he was a great guy, but he was really an evil villain.
"You are horrible. Did you create the monster?" I miffed, gritting my teeth.
"Oh no Jonathan. Everyone knows that I am too stupid to make a monster," he spat out the "too stupid" part with anguish. "But I did set it loose. Oh yes, and after I did, I joined the team. I had a beeper that told me where the monster was at all times. Everyone on the team trusted me, so I could lead them far away from the monster. But that awful night when you found the monster, I wasn't able to get the team to leave. I went in to my tent and tried to send the monster a command to go away, but apparently that did no good. I hope you are happy, Jonathan."
"I could never be happy to find out that my friend wants me dead."
"Oh, nobody feels so bad for you..."
There was a few more last things that I didn't get. Agent Eggplant wanted the monster not to be found by us, but once we had found it, he wanted it dead. I asked him this. To this he fumed, "I couldn't have my cover blown. I had to pretend that I wanted the monster as dead as you guys. But you didn't want it dead. You wanted to do tests. You would have found my DNA on the monster, and I would have gotten found out. I hope you're happy Jonathan."
"And you smell like a sewer! Just like Willy, my room and the monster!"
"Yes. Agent S--I mean The Sugar Scientist's lab is in the sewage system. Willy actually found the layer, and began to sneak around trying to find all of the clues he would need. He always knew that I was evil, he was just sensible enough not to tell until he knew it was time. He didn't tell the team because he didn't want to scare you guys when you found out that your dear Agent Eggplant was a Super Villain's Helper. But I think that Major Mushroom was getting onto him...or at least I think he was grouchy that he thought Willy had a secret and wouldn't tell him it. Got it?"
Agent S...that sounded familiar...I had it!
"Did you just say Agent S? Who is he?"
Agent Eggplant sighed and muttered sadly, "He was our greatest agent. Then, one day, he went out on his mission and never returned. When we finally found him, he had starved and was alone in the woods. The detectives came and started swabbing him for information, but the found that he was wearing tons of makeup. After they had wiped it all off, we saw that he wasn't a squash, but sugar. Shortly after his wife came forward and announced that he had run away because he had just found out that his wife was pregnant. The baby grew up and found out about he father. He found out that his father was a secret spy, and a super villain who was just about to unleash a monster onto Veggieville when he was told his wife was pregnant and ran away. After reading map after map, diary after diary, the baby finally found his layer in the Sewer System. The baby grew up to be The Sugar Scientist. He has taken over his father's dreams! He has succeeded! Just you wait and see! You think you have won, but you haven't! Happy now?" And he laughed the most maniacal laugh ever.
But I wasn't happy. And after I called the cops, and they dragged Agent Eggplant away, I still wasn't happy. And after the team came up and thanked me for finding Agent Eggplant, I still wasn't happy. I went home at three in the morning, yet I wasn't tired. I went into my hole and sat in my rocking chair with a cup of tea and rocked and thought. So I had never saved the day. I mean, I had found the monster and the culprit, but I hadn't become a Super Carrot. And I had spent that whole time thinking I knew who my one ally was in the entire team, but really that ally wanted me dead. And now I wouldn't graduate High School this year, and I'd have to go back. I was sure Archie Artichoke was being held back too, so here was to another miserable year with him.
What had I gotten myself into? I wished that I had something to say about the experience that was enlightening, but I couldn't. I wasted about a month for nothing, absolutely nothing. I thought about how four miles away, Agent Eggplant was sitting in a jail cell cold and alone like myself. And he was probably thinking too. For he had never became a Super Villain, and he had seen his entire team throw him into prison. As I thought about him sitting in thought dark, musty jail cell, I had an uncontrollable and horrible urge to see him again, and to say I was sorry, sorry that we both hadn't accomplished what we had wanted.
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It was Monday. Monday meaning school day. School day meaning first day back to Veggie Ville High, whoohoo. I had planned all weekend how I would return, what I would say, what I would wear. I knew that Archie would find someway to make it look like I was some kind of insecure nit wit who had to skip school for a month after I had just a teeny embarrassing situation at my school, but I knew that wasn't it. I would be strong and fierce, and I wouldn't let Archie get to me. It was time to go back.
I walked out the door and down the old dirty road in the meadow where I had always traveled down on my way to school. Everything was different, the ground was filled with sweet smelling clovers and fresh vibrant colored pansies. The sun was hot and beat down on me with gorgeous waves of sweet heat. The wind eased its way through the air and floated carelessly through the sky, leisurely on its way to blow the petals of the flowers, and the grass on my head. Then, all to soon, the path stopped. There, standing in the bright beating sun, was Veggie Ville High. I walked in through the heavy doors and gasped.
All over the hallways papers were floating and plastered to the floor. The doorways had collapsed, and the walls had tremendous chunks taken out. What in the world had happened? Just as I thought this, the students poured out of the classrooms, all with mindless chatter about all sorts of things. The first person that I saw was Archie, and he stared back at me. I walked up to him slowly, and touched my fingers lightly on his prickly shoulder.
"Archie..." I soothed slowly, "what happened here?"
"A...a...a monster Jonathan. He came and he...he...he ruined our school...yes, yes it was horrible...we were all here! and he...he just...just didn't care Jonathan. He trashed our school and took our books...and...and then he left..." Archie moaned with a clear pain in his voice. I couldn't listen to this any longer. The monster had come to my school and terrorized all of the students who were here. It was purely sick.
I nodded my head slowly and patted him on the shoulder. I was starving, I needed lunch. On my way to the cafeteria, I saw more of the monster's work exhibited all over the school. He had come here with no mercy, and completely carelessly. The students all seemed the same, but yet different. When they saw me, the stopped talking and looked at me with wide eyes. They somehow associated me with the attack. I hated that. When teachers saw me, they smiled but the corners of their mouths seemed tired from being forced to always turn up when they were so obviously in a state of pain. I smiled meekly to all of them and kept walking. All over the school was signs to help re-construct it, there would be a fundraiser this Friday, and a huge community project over April Break, which started this Saturday. At least they were doing something.
I finally reached the cafeteria, it was probably worse than the rest of the building, yet the lunch ladies kept cooking food. I looked up at what they were serving today, and it brought a smile, a real smile back to my face.
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Below this was a picture of a menu with a "todays special: chickpea gruel" it didnt come out. Also When he was talking about his signatures, there were two different signatures, they also didnt come out. To see them comment below and naomi will send them to you!
John George (Super Carrot)
